farsickness | Celebratory Dinner

Entry tags:

xue yang | the untamed

Celebratory Dinner

WHO: Xue Yang, Song Lan, Xiao Xingchen, Lan Wangji, Wei Wuxian
WHEN: January 30, evening
WHAT: Xue Yang's celebrating being in Gazin for a year with his family! And...extended family that he knows about. Something of a mingle!
WHERE: His house at the edge of Gazin
WARNINGS: Shouldn't be any but will update as needed!

Prep time!
Xue Yang has barely been aware of the passage of time, it's true. And he's not entirely sure when he first arrived, only that it looks around this time. And so much has happened! He knows he's amusing his Daozhangs with his extra energy, but he only grins and keeps going. So much to cook! So much to bake!

Including a couple vegetarian options, with a thought to the rumored diet of the GusuLan, that they do not eat meat. Not that it's difficult, for Xingchen rarely does too - he thinks. He doesn't mind making sure everyone will have something to eat. There are mild flavored dishes and spicy ones, as well as a stew. And of course there is a tasty fruit tart that mingles sweet and tart, as well as an assortment of candies - sweet, tart, or with a nice kick of spice.

General bouncing around
In between prep sessions, Xue Yang is working on making sure the cabin and immediate surroundings are clean and tidy, and the horses are tucked away, cozy in their stable with plenty of hay, oats, and fresh water that is in a trough magicked to not freeze courtesy of Merlan. He'd sent a messenger the day before to invite his Senior and Hanguang-Jun - Lan Sizhui would have been invited too if he knew the boy was in Gazin.

And there's a nice fire roaring away, keeping the cabin nice and toasty. There's no sign of Jiangzai, or any weapon at all on the gremlin, and there are pretty little decorations scattered here and there, arranged just so to not appear cluttered. But to personalize the warm home he and Song Lan have made for the three of them.

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Not a lie. He knows his husband can't lie, especially not to him. But the attempt to find a way to soothe him without really answering him spikes his curiosity even more.

Only the love he has for this man keeps him from bounding up the stairs to their room to find...whatever it is that's there. Zichen says he doesn't need to worry. Which means he'll find out...when his husband wants to show him. He could push, but he finds himself reluctant to do so.

Which leaves him with only one option: to tuck his head against his husband's shoulder, leaning against him to will himself to patience.

"I don't have anything to worry about when you're with me." Zichen has proven that to be true.

His heart leaps at the snuggling, his body flushing with sudden warmth. Zichen wraps his arms around Xue Yang after stowing the little bottle behind him on the counter. A well of nerves rises in him then and he clutches tighter, licking his lips nervously.

"A-Yang, I'm not sure about my present for you. I wanted to celebrate and I wasn't sure... Certain circumstances brought your gift into my hands." he frowns at his own rambling and finally pulls back, taking hold of Xue Yang's good hand, "You must be quiet and gentle."

Those arms curling around him make him hum, relaxing instantly. Then Zichen holds him tighter, showing all signs of nerves, and that has him concerned. He peeks up at his husband again, listening.

He doesn't cling when Zichen pulls back, letting his husband take his hand - Zichen could take his bad hand if he wanted and he wouldn't complain or resist. Quiet and gentle? "It's from you. I'll love it." Xue Yang gently squeezes Zichen's fingers in encouragement.

"You know me very well by now. Can I be quiet and gentle enough for it?" He thinks so. But he trusts Zichen's opinion more.

Almost in apology, Zichen leans in and kisses Xue Yang's lips softly, giving his fingers a gentle squeeze. He brushes his nose against his husband's cheek before leading him to their bedroom. Yes, he believes this man he has come to love so much can be quiet and gentle enough.

In one of the corners, there is a basket. Laying sleepily on a soft, worn blanket is a black squirrel. The baby is in a haze of sleepy contentedness - they have just been fed - and they barely notice that they have visitors.

"Sometimes they fall from trees and the mother is no longer interested in caring for them. I have examined her and she has no broken bones. She can be tamed, A-Yang, and live a much longer life indoors." Zichen speaks softly, unsure.

It was tempting to deepen the kiss, but no. Not right now. Xue Yang lets it stay sweet, understanding the near-apology behind it. He smiles lovingly at the cute nudge of Zichen's nose to his cheek and lets himself be led up to their room. It's enough of an answer, and his husband's faith in him warms him.

He still draws in a quick breath of surprise at the tiny bundle in a basket, all wrapped up and clearly half asleep and comfy. Awe flushes his face and there's a tenderness that sweeps over him, rarely seen outside of when he's watching his Daozhangs in a quiet moment.

"She's beautiful," he whispers, hushed. He hardly dares to look away from her, but he turns a bright smile to his husband. "Thank you for bringing her home, A-Lan. We will take good care of her," as his sweet husband has already begun to. And he leans up to press another soft kiss to Zichen's lips, nuzzling their lips together.

Later. Zichen has every intention of claiming time with Xue Yang - and if Xingchen wants to join them, he is welcome. But it will just be them. Days like this only serve to strengthen their bond and help them remember what they have overcome.

That is why Zichen would never be able to leave a scared or hurt animal to the whims of nature. He has been given help and blessings beyond number. He likes passing those blessings on. And black squirrels are rare - at least he hasn't seen many. She reminded him of his A-Yang immediately.

Despite her size, he senses a strength in her - a will to live. So he has been feeding her every hour, comforting her when she cries and snuggling her when she feels cold.

Xue Yang can do those things too.

"She belongs with you." he blushes before that beautiful smile, sighing when he is kissed. He deepens the contact a little, proud of his husband.

"In the next hour, you can feed her. A little milk and water if she's thirsty. She can have as much water as she likes." he softens, "She's soft. You'll like holding her."

Edited 2021-01-31 14:53 (UTC)

Dinner will have their home a little more crowded than usual, but he doesn't expect Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji to stick around long afterward. Which suits him too. He wants them both to see how he is with Zichen and Xingchen now.

Xue Yang flushes too at being told the sweet young creature belongs with him. And the deepening of the kiss, just a little, warms him just that much more. He listens to the instructions and forces himself not to bounce in anticipation, leaning against his husband again to remind himself to remain still.

"She will want for nothing," he promises his sweet Zichen. He can't quite help looking over at her again, a shy delight and wonder returning to settle over him and helps calm his usual energetic bounce of excitement. "I've never seen a black one before."

Zichen wants the pair to see their relationship too. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji were pulled into the mix - and the disaster - and they deserve to know that the danger has passed. He also wants them to befriend his A-Yang and A-Chen. They would benefit from it, surely. Zichen knows he has.

The baby squirrel's back leg kicks a little as she dreams, her tongue barely peeking out of her mouth.

"She will be a good companion and if we keep the house warm during winter, she won't hibernate."

Though she might be a bit chubby from preparing for the harsh season, but they can play with her and that chubbiness won't last long.

"I haven't seen one either. Her mother might not have recognized her as one of her own."

His lips tingle and he gives his beloved a soft smile, drawing him into his arms.

"Soon we will have our anniversary. How would you like to celebrate it?"

He thinks Wuxian doesn't hate him anymore. He has at least let himself be teased in playing, which had made Xue Yang full of delight. And no stabbing has happened, neither with Wuxian (though admittedly more, at first, because he'd hidden anything sharp from Wuxian when he'd dragged him home) or Wangji.

The baby squirrel is too cute! But he resists moving over to pet her - patience, he reminds himself. When she wakes because of hunger, he will get to welcome her home himself, and feed her. "I'm tired of being cold," he murmurs. "A-Chen won't say it, but I'm sure he is too. Yi City was very cold, except...we weren't alone. It's better here." He is better.

"That's sad," he whispers, heart suddenly aching for the little squirrel. "We'll be her family now."

Then he's pulled into warm, strong arms, and his husband smiles so softly at him that he melts into those arms. The question and reminder brings another bright smile to his lips. "Maybe a visit to the hot springs again? But then just...stay home together. A quiet dinner, the three of us if A-Chen wants to join us."

No stabbing! Zichen would panic if that happened and have some strong words for both men. Gazin is brand new for all of them and they need to be open to every possibility - even the ones that once seemed impossible. He never saw himself loving Xue Yang. Someone so cruel and violent could never capture his heart. And yet, here, he has discovered that the cruelty and the violence were merely masks; covers for Xue Yang's pain and bitterness.

The more he reached out to soothe that pain, the more he was rewarded by seeing this man before him. Of course Zichen fell in love.

"Then stay right here." he wraps his husband in his arms and rests their foreheads together, nuzzling with a contented smile, "You're not in Yi City and neither is Xingchen. You're in a house we built."

A house that he loves because he can sense the presence of either Xue Yang or Xingchen (or both) in every room.

"Her story won't stay sad...and neither will yours." he rubs over his A-Yang's back and hums his approval at the ideas, "We can do both. A nice soak and then we can return for dinner."

His cheeks pink and he smiles a little more.

"We can both ask him when the time comes."

The moment Zichen had decided to teach him how to meditate, had taken the time to show him...had shown him the same kindness that had drawn Xue Yang to Xingchen...that's all it had taken. Each new lesson has drawn them even closer, and then...

Something amazing had set in. Love. Fierce, protective, warm love. Just as deep as what both feel for Xiao Xingchen, if special and different in its own right. Zichen's patient work on Xue Yang's battered body to heal and ease lingering damage done throughout his life has done wonders for his pain. He barely limps even on a bad day now, and his bad hand feels much better. He only wears the brace when he works, now.

He snuggles into his husband's arms and happily nuzzles back, smiling softly at the sweet words. "I like it here with you and A-Chen. And our home is nice and warm." Perfectly timed, because of the drastic chill in the air the last couple months.

Each room has a personalized touch. There's a bit of all three of them everywhere, while remaining tidy and well kept.

"How can my story stay sad when I have my sweet Daozhangs?" When he has love? When he has good guidance?

He nudges his nose to a blushing cheek, eyes bright with delight and love. "It'll be warmer by then too. We won't have to be too cold on the way back."

Zichen will continue to work on the damage, massaging in ointments and salves and urging his A-Yang to soak. They've been able to come a long way in Xue Yang's pain level and that gives him hope. His husband is young - he shouldn't be forever tormented by agony.

His arms are strong, supporting his beloved as they speak so sweetly. He raises a hand to briefly smooth back a strand of silky soft hair, not wanting anything to interrupt his view of his husband's happy expression.

"Then stay inside, A-Yang. As much as you are able." he presses a kiss to Xue Yang's cheek, breathing in the pleasant scent of his skin, "In one way or another, you will always have us. You are loved."

Without a doubt. Zichen makes a happy sound somewhere between a sigh and a chuckle at the pressure against his cheek.

"I'll wrap you up anyway, my love. Your body doesn't need another excuse to ache."

How can he do anything but heal at the warm, strong, gentle hands of his husband? Not only does he love the attention and affection, but the massages and soaks feel obscenely good. Even with the occasional flash of pain that gets quickly soothed.

Xue Yang leans into the hand as Zichen smooths his hair back. "I like going out to ride, and the cold is nice after being in the forge much of the day." He turns his head to steal a kiss, mischievous love shining in his eyes. "So are you. I won't forget anything you've taught me. Even if you leave...I won't stop being someone you can love." Another kiss, as if to seal it as a promise.

He grins at the sound his sweet husband makes and tightens his embrace. "You can do anything you want with me. I'll snuggle close so you're not too cold either!"

He has to admit - at least to himself - that he likes touching his husband. He likes soothing him and following the curves and planes of his body. The sounds his A-Yang makes are tantalizing, of course, but he tells himself sternly that he isn't helping him because it's pleasurable!

But it is a nice side effect.

"Wear a cloak and keep your hand covered." Zichen rests his hand on Xue Yang's cheek, his lips parting in surprise at the kiss. His gaze drops shyly but it doesn't last.

"This is you. This is your best self. Whether I'm here or not, I love you." he leans into the next kiss, helping to seal the promise with a low hum. The arms tightening around him feel good and his smile is a little dazed.

"Thank you. I can't be cold if you do that." he glances to their new baby when she squeaks, gently nudging his beloved to the basket bed, "You can soothe her. She likes being pet softly."

A very, very nice side effect~ That always leaves him feeling rather boneless, safe, and loved.

"I do," he murmurs. "I know how you worry, so I try to do things to lessen it." But he can't help a playful little grin either! "Though you are rather cute when you worry about me. And I do like how you fuss over me."

Xue Yang nods, listening intently. Every time his A-Lan says those amazing words, he remembers them. He tucks the memory away, close to his heart. He happily leans in against his husband and nuzzles that sweet dazed smile, helpless against how sweet Zichen looks.

But then he hears a squeak! He doesn't need to be told twice, and releases his husband to move softly over to the basket. Slow, gentle, quiet - that's what Zichen had asked of him. "Hello sweet one," he croons as he settles carefully beside the basket and slowly reaches in to rub gentle fingertips over her soft fur. There's a child-like sense of awe that settles over him again, making it simple to be calm and quiet. "You're safe."

He sleeps better like that, doesn't he? Zichen never minds sharing his A-Yang's body heat; it helps him look after him. If he were to sleep in another bed or room, he might miss Xue Yang's discomfort or pain. That would be awful.

And, frankly, he likes holding him and hearing the soft sound of his breathing.

"It's my nature."

Someone has to worry. Xingchen isn't very good at looking after himself either. But that's okay. They have him and so he will keep them safe.

"Cute...?" his nose wrinkles faintly. He didn't know he could be cute? Then again, he can't see himself right now. He can't see how young he looks when he smiles or how greatly Xue Yang affects him - his eyes brightening and his skin flushing. The nuzzling is met with a long kiss.

Then he lets his beloved go, smiling tenderly at the little ball of black fuzz.

"Perfect." he murmurs, voice rich with approval at how Xue Yang chooses to approach the tiny creature. The little twitching and squeaking quiets and she seems to heave a big (for her) sigh of relief.

Zichen kneels down beside his husband and rubs over his back.

"Think of names, A-Yang. Once you know her better."

Oh yes. He sleeps very well most nights now, curled up with his husband. Zichen always feels warm, and Xue Yang loves knowing the other man is right there with him.

"I love your nature."

And doesn't Xue Yang worry, now, over his Daozhangs? Yes. He does. He fusses over them too. That nose wrinkling makes him grin and he nuzzles their noses together. Only to sigh into the long kiss, eyes fluttering closed as he thoroughly enjoys it.

Hearing that approval at how he approaches the baby squirrel has him flush with delight. It only feels natural to move so carefully around a creature so small! He keeps up the gentle petting, but settles against his husband again and hums at the rubbing to his back.

"I will."

Any bad dreams are kissed away and Zichen reminds Xue Yang, if necessary, of his strength. How can a nightmare possibly overwhelm him? That's preposterous. So Xue Yang is safe and loved and tucked into his arms and against his strong chest.

"I love yours."

Who his husband is now - who he should have been all along. He likes being fussed over - to him, it's just another sign of love. The nuzzling makes his heart ache and he leans into the kiss, making sure his A-Yang is kissed thoroughly and well.

Their baby interrupts them, though Zichen can only smile. He loves watching Xue Yang being sweet and gentle.

"I'll show you how much milk to give her. As she grows, she won't need feedings as frequently."

It's then that the little squirrel opens her eyes and peers up at them, her paws latching onto Xue Yang's finger. She sniffs his hand intently and gives a yawn.

That strength is what allows Xue Yang to fall back asleep after any nightmare does wake him. That stubbornness to hold onto him, even with him having told Zichen everything. He doesn't take it for granted.

He flushes shyly at that reply, knowing what his husband means. "I like myself a lot more now," he admits. "I'm happy."

And then he's being kissed like that! And it steals his breath away, not that he minds even a little. He's panting for breath by the time it breaks.

He doesn't mind their little one's interruption either! It means he gets to fuss lightly over her and introduce himself.

"She'll always get what she needs. And more love than she can handle!" And then she opens her eyes, and Xue Yang feels her latch onto his heart, as well as his finger. He wiggles that finger a little, smiling down at her as he lets her keep it. "Go back to sleep, little one," he croons to her. "We'll check on you again."

"I want you to be happy." Zichen reinforces, peering into his husband's eyes solemnly, "You chose to make the changes, A-Yang. You chose to align yourself with Xingchen and me. I love the man you have become; you feel...freer...to me." he softens his demeanor and smiles, "But I don't want you to be someone you're not for anyone. Not for Xingchen or me. Just...be safe."

And then he kisses Xue Yang, fiercely, demonstrating his love for him. For as long as his husband wants him to follow him, to walk the same path, hand in hand, he will.

The tiny squirrel seems to like the fussing! She puffs out a breath at the wiggling, holding onto his finger tighter. Her belly is soft and round from Zichen's care - she was so thin when he found her - and there is a sparkle in her eyes.

"She'll be playful." as most squirrels are - another reason Zichen thought of his beloved when he found her. Yet she has some growing to do before she can truly play with him. Her eyes lid and then close and she tucks her fluffy tail against her face, all nice and snug.

Edited 2021-02-01 07:51 (UTC)

Xue Yang stares back, not shying from his husband's solemn regard. "Do you remember when A-Chen first left us here? And again when I told you both everything, how I was before we reconnected? I could have gone back to who I was before. Easily. I didn't...because that's not who I am anymore.

"You two are special and important to me. But I won't...revert to the monster I used to be. I like who I am now. You both showed me the way and have given me so much...so many ways to stay...Free."

He purrs into that kiss, opening himself to it freely, joyously. Just as fiercely loving as Zichen gives him.

The little squirrel makes him grin again and he rubs a thumb gently over her sweet head, encouraging her to sleep - and to admire her soft fur! He stifles the laugh when the baby wraps her tail around her and very carefully withdraws his hand. So cute! "And full of mischief," he adds with a glint of that himself.

"I do." he answers calmly, letting Xue Yang speak the truth without interruption. Without judgement. This is a truth that makes him happy, however, unlike what he had been told before. Zichen nods, expression open and sweet at his beloved's choice.

"You were in so much pain. Not just physically, either. Your heart was broken and you were writhing, taking down those who ventured close enough to you. I know why you sought out Xingchen; why you wanted his attention. He is someone you need; someone pure and good who can give you another chance." he pauses and adds, less steadily, "I'm not like him. I'm not nice to you because I'm innocent or naive; I'm nice to you because you have earned it. You have proven yourself to be a good man, Xue Yang."

Just the sort of man who makes Zichen's blood burn and his body come to life after a long season of frost. The kiss takes his breath away and he pants, licking his lips as they part.

"Yes, love. Always full of mischief." he grins down at the sleepy baby and strokes over her ears with his fingertip, "She will do well. I want her to bond with you especially. Do you have any old fabric that smells like you, by chance?"

This skill Zichen has, to just let him talk and talk and talk, not interrupting or judging; it's something Xue Yang needs, too. He knows he can tell his husband anything, that he doesn't need to hide even the smallest thing. Zichen has come to accept him, and that belief in him is something he relies on.

And he repays that respect, happy to listen openly to anything his Zichen has to say. He holds his sweet husband at that unsteady note, his expression remains open and soft. "And that is a gift, love. That you can love me, be nice to me, for who I am, despite what I used to do. You two gave me a chance and showed me how to take it."

The fact they've learned how to drive each other mad with desire is just another bonus~ Xue Yang enjoys teasing his husband into ravishing him.

He kisses his husband's cheek at the question and carefully pulls away to get the old under tunic he'd worn when he first came to Gazin. He hasn't worn the old robes since that first couple weeks, choosing to adopt the style of the locals here. And this old tunic has certainly seen better days. He carefully folds it up as he returns to his husband's side. "Make it into a bed for her?"

"It's in the past." Zichen raises one of Xue Yang's hands to his lips, kissing his fingers, "If we were all held accountable, endlessly, for our mistakes, how miserable would we be? Forgiveness exists for those who are truly filled with regret. And once forgiveness is given, the past holds no power over the future."

Speaking of said mad desire, Zichen knows, soon, he will have no choice but to pin his husband to a wall...or their bed. But he won't ravish him mid-party. That would be impolite.

Still, he smiles to himself at the thought, feeling a little mischievous.

"Yes. Then she will equate your scent with comfort." he arches a brow, "Will you lift her, love? Cradle her in your hands and I will see the bed made."

He hums in agreement, watching as his hand is pulled up for those kisses, a quiet softness in his eyes. "I love you, A-Lan," he murmurs.

Oh dear, what ever will he do?

Xue Yang grins, just getting to see that mischief. He sets the cloth on his husband's lap before carefully reaching in to gently scoop up the little squirrel. He holds her close, eyes going wide again in awe at how tiny and delicate she feels.

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