Xue Yang (
jiangzaid) wrote in
farsickness2020-02-03 09:02 am
Entry tags:
Arrival of another Chinese wizard!
WHO: Xue Yang + Various/Open!
WHEN: First couple days
WHAT: Finishing up TDM threads, plus fresh stuff!
WHERE: Around Gazin and the forest
WARNINGS: The Untamed general warnings aka ghosts, necromancy, dead things, killing said dead things, possible torture....and then there's Xue Yang who is kind of insane but trying to get better. :D EDIT: Gaaaay in thread with Xiao Xingchen. XD Just kissing though.
Arrival/Around Town:
Learning a whole new language in this way is interesting to say the least, but does it matter when it's useful? Yes, because he wants to learn how to do it too! Xue Yang plans to study that sort of magic if and whenever given the opportunity. Finding Xiao Xingchen alive again is enough to get his cooperation though, even without certain others playing into him promising not to go around stabbing just anyone. It's boring but...worth it.
Now though, he wanders through the town, sword sheathed at his back as he strolls along each street and alley, poking his head through open or unlocked doors to see what sort of people are doing what here. When he sees something he wants, or thinks Xingchen would like (or even Wen Qing...) he buys it before moving on.
Forest:
It can get boring in around the town though, especially when he has to behave. So forgive him, Wangji, Xingchen, for going out beyond the border of the town to let off steam and play with the other monsters out there again. Besides, it plays a part in keeping the people in town safer, right? He's being nice and helpful! Like a 'proper cultivator'! Instead of the half-crazy hooligan he's better known as, if not flat out rabid attack dog.
He mostly just uses his sword though, slashing, cutting, stabbing at everything that moves around him, often with a yell or mocking laughter to spur others on into moving foolishly and giving him an even better opening.
WHEN: First couple days
WHAT: Finishing up TDM threads, plus fresh stuff!
WHERE: Around Gazin and the forest
WARNINGS: The Untamed general warnings aka ghosts, necromancy, dead things, killing said dead things, possible torture....and then there's Xue Yang who is kind of insane but trying to get better. :D EDIT: Gaaaay in thread with Xiao Xingchen. XD Just kissing though.
Arrival/Around Town:
Learning a whole new language in this way is interesting to say the least, but does it matter when it's useful? Yes, because he wants to learn how to do it too! Xue Yang plans to study that sort of magic if and whenever given the opportunity. Finding Xiao Xingchen alive again is enough to get his cooperation though, even without certain others playing into him promising not to go around stabbing just anyone. It's boring but...worth it.
Now though, he wanders through the town, sword sheathed at his back as he strolls along each street and alley, poking his head through open or unlocked doors to see what sort of people are doing what here. When he sees something he wants, or thinks Xingchen would like (or even Wen Qing...) he buys it before moving on.
Forest:
It can get boring in around the town though, especially when he has to behave. So forgive him, Wangji, Xingchen, for going out beyond the border of the town to let off steam and play with the other monsters out there again. Besides, it plays a part in keeping the people in town safer, right? He's being nice and helpful! Like a 'proper cultivator'! Instead of the half-crazy hooligan he's better known as, if not flat out rabid attack dog.
He mostly just uses his sword though, slashing, cutting, stabbing at everything that moves around him, often with a yell or mocking laughter to spur others on into moving foolishly and giving him an even better opening.

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He frowns at the question, not liking the reminder of how the other man has been snubbed for being blind before. The hand he holds is grasped a little tighter in reassurance and silent promise to not let such stupidity tear them apart any more here than in Yi City.
"It won't be a problem," he promises firmly.
"The door is just before us if you will open it?"
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Xiao Xingchen takes a deep breath, excited despite himself. He reaches out until he finds the doorknob, turning it and letting the door swing in. He tilts his head, listening.
"It's so much bigger."
He can tell by the tiniest little squeak that the swinging door made, the way it echoes through the room. He steps across the threshold, drawing the other man with him.
"How much did you say the job was paying you again?"
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He leads Xingchen toward the kitchen so he can put the bag down, after nudging the door closed with a foot. The windows are large enough to let in light during the day, and he's bought some candles and grabbed some wood while he was out earlier to give them light and heat later (though some wood is already piled by the stove).
"Enough I can keep us fed. It's a portion of everything this merchant sells, and they seem pretty good at what they do."
He'd done his best to check with multiple sources before speaking with the man.
"There are more blankets, too, Daozhang!"
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He doesn't think of where he'll be sleeping. The floor would be fine, especially when he mentions extra blankets.
"I'll be able to help you soon." It has taken him a little longer to find a job, but there's still plenty of things that Xingchen can do as well as others, if given the chance. He smiles at the end of the little tour. "We'll be comfortable here. I like it very much."
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The praise has him grin with delight, watching the earnest play of emotions over the other's face. "You don't have to. I'll take good care of you here."
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"We're a family. We take care of each other."
Xingchen couldn't say exactly when he started thinking of them that way. It was when A-Qing was with them, for sure. But there was a time when their lives became so intimately interwoven, it just didn't seem right to describe the bond as anything less.
"I'll try again tomorrow. Should I chop up some vegetables?"
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"Exactly," somehow managing to speak through the somewhat painful emotion. "And so we will share the bed, since we finally have a comfortable one." He pitches his voice to invite no further arguments.
Is this happiness? He keeps wondering. But it's too fragile still, too many uncertainties. It can't last.
"Only if you don't add your fingers to dinner," he adjusts his tone to tease, leading the way back to the kitchen before reluctantly letting go of Xingchen's hand to build up a cooking fire.
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He shakes his head at Xue Yang's playful concern.
"They wouldn't add much flavor. And you said the meat was hard to chew last time." He smiles and pushes his sleeves up, where Xue Yang can clearly see that he still has all ten of his fingers. Xingchen feels around the kitchen until he finds what he needs, and then focuses on chopping.
"Should we invite others for a meal sometime?"
He grew up on a mountain, he's not entirely sure how having visitors works. But surely his lively companion would enjoy more than just his quiet company from time to time.
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Xue Yang laughs and immediately reaches to touch each finger as if he needs to check for himself that the other man is fully intact. A gentle squeeze then he's letting go so Xingchen can get to work.
He crouches down to rustle around with wood and the stove, but there's a pout in his voice to match the look he sends at Xingchen. "Tired of my company, Daozhang? I don't need anyone else."
Just Xiao Xingchen. Alive. Happy. Safe.
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"Of course. I'm sorry if it sounded that way." There's an apology in his voice. He really didn't mean to make him feel like he was tired of his company, he's not. "I just worry that you think you have to take care of me all the time, when you should be making friends your own age. It would be easy for you."
He transfers the chopped vegetables to a pot, then gets to work on washing the rice next. Another thought occurs to him.
"I bet there are nice girls in the village too."
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Xue Yang goes still, staring at at Xingchen in amazement. Eventually his breath huffs out in a fond little laugh, and he shakes his head. Well. He might as well just...
Go for it. While he still can.
"Daozhang...I'm much older than you think. And I've never liked girls."
He's done with the fire anyway, the stove heating up nicely, and he dusts his hands off as he straightens, then approaches Xingchen. He knows exactly why his heart is starting to race, but it doesn't matter. "And I like taking care of you," he murmurs as he gets closer.
He picks his moment after the rice is washed. Reaches up to gently turn Xingchen's face to him to press the lightest, gentlest kiss he can manage to the other's lips.
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The other thing is less surprising to him, but not because Xingchen suspected anything. If his friend liked boys instead of girls, that was fine too. There's no right or wrong there, he simply takes a breath to alter his previous statement, replace "girls" with "boys".
He doesn't say it. The other doesn't need him meddling in that part of his life, especially when Xingchen doesn't actually have any advice to offer. He smiles and shakes his head at himself, once more touched by this man that he saved so many months ago. It was the right thing to do no matter what, but he's repaid that kindness time and again.
The touch against his face surprises him, but it doesn't startle him. Xingchen turns his face towards him willingly, clueless even when he senses him nearing. wondering even when he feels the warmth of his breath against his lips. It's not until the touch of his actual mouth that he's aware of the kiss. It's sweet and gentle and Xingchen smiles in spite of himself.
"You don't want someone like me." It's quiet but firm, Xingchen lifting a hand to slide against his hair affectionately. "And you don't have to do this. We can stay together as long as you want."
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Xue Yang marvels at the trust, the lack of recoil or flinch as he moves Xingchen's face to him. Warm, alive. He'd missed it so much. Desperately. And now...Xiao Xingchen is right here with him again, once again ignorant of the monster he's been living with.
The smile he sees when he pulls back a little after the kiss as his chest feel strangely tight. But then Xingchen is denying he should want someone like Xiao Xingchen!
He chuckles, the sound thin and almost as tight as his chest feels. Then leans in to press a firmer kiss to those warm, soft lips.
"I don't have to," he agrees, trying for a light tone. "I want to. I want you."
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Naive.
And of course he trusts him. They've lived together, went on nighthunts together, had their meals together and slept under the same roof. So Xingchen doesn't resist the second kiss either, even if it makes this feel all the more real. It makes him realize just how serious the other really is.
His heart beats a little faster then. He doesn't want to lose him. Xingchen has already lost one person who was so dear to him, was the source of his anguish and his anger. He doesn't want that history to repeat again. He doesn't want to hurt someone again, especially not someone he cares so much about.
"I'm right here." His voice is soft. Because that's what he meant, right? "And even if you never did another thing for me, it's enough that you've stayed with me. You make me happy."
And the real tragedy is just how true that is.
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And now...he has a chance. He'll take it with both hands, hold on to it as long as he can. As tight as he can manage. Protect this precious light to his last breath, no matter how much it ends up hurting.
Xue Yang stands close enough then that slipping an arm loosely around Xingchen's waist just feels natural. And listening to that sweet, soft voice tell him that he makes Xingchen happy makes anything less impossible. He leans his forehead against the other man's, hand still light on perfect cheek, fingertips a gentle caress despite the slight roughness of a hand used to hard work.
"I'm not going anywhere. And I don't break my word."
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It's a lot, and one of the things that life on the mountain hadn't prepared him for. The other is obviously more experienced in things than he gave him credit for. Xingchen fears that he'll disappoint him at how slowly he would need to take these feelings - and how seriously.
But they've made promises, and he's chosen to trust him.
"If we don't start cooking soon, our dinner will become our breakfast."
And okay, that could be taken a certain way, but this is Xiao Xingchen here.
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Xue Yang flinches slightly, fingers curling away from Xingchen's cheek and arm dropping away from the other's waist. Disappointment is an old friend, just as anger is. But.
But. He makes himself think.
This man is...naive. Innocent in so many ways. He's probably never thought of anything like this. And...Xingchen has already told him that he makes him happy. So he lets the disappointment and flash of anger out with a breath, then leans in to press one last soft kiss to the other's lips before he pulls back.
It's hard. To move away now. To pull back and stop when all he wants to do is hold Xingchen close to him, show him all the ways flesh can find pleasure.
...He won't do to Xiao Xingchen what was done to him though.
"I...Daozhang...I want to keep making you happy. But if you ever want me to go...I will go."
Even if he knows it will destroy him. Doesn't he deserve that, too?
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Xingchen can hear it in his breath, feel it in the way that the other withdraws from him. It makes him frown. He didn't want to do that. It's just that Xue Yang's thoughts are correct - he doesn't really know what to do in this situation. This is the closest he's been to another person since...since Zichen. But Xingchen knew him in a different way. Their bond was instant and natural. Spiritual, but not physical.
He reaches for his hand, finding Xue Yang's wrist instead, mere inches above his damaged pinky.
"Don't say such a thing." His voice is soft, gentle. It doesn't betray the way that his normally steady heart has started to race. Supper is forgotten now. He's made him feel like this, like he's unwanted and to be chased away on a whim like a stray dog. "I'm the one who doesn't know how to make you happy. Please be patient with me."
He can learn. The same way he learned how to kiss, stepping in and leaning closer to be the one who kisses him this time.
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But the hand latching onto his wrist has him freeze, eyes wide and he finds it strangely hard to breathe. But he listens, lips parted as he stares at this beautiful, perfect man as he's asked to be patient with him.
...And then he's the one being kissed. Interrupts all thoughts. But then he presses just a little into the kiss before forcing himself to stop the addicting kisses, a wavering little laugh shaking his shoulders.
"...As much time as you need." There's a smile back in his voice.
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Xingchen is relieved when he doesn't push him away, the way he thought he might. He'd have that right. Maybe it seems like he's toying with him, but he wouldn't. He'd never. And then he hears his laughter, genuine this time, and Xingchen exhales heavily before smiling himself.
"I'm not very worldly. Such things must go over my head. But...I know that someone like you deserves consideration too. I wouldn't want you to have regrets."
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It can't last, he keeps telling himself. Some day- soon, he knows, his identity will be revealed. And he will be pushed away. Discarded again, like so many times before. But this time...this time he'd go quietly. As long as Xiao Xingchen remains alive...what happens to Xue Yang doesn't matter.
Later.
Now, he finds himself smiling again, unable to help himself whenever the other man laughs or smiles. "You don't have to be." His voice is back to normal, for the man Xingchen knows. "I don't regret the time we spend together, Daozhang. Not even for a second."
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He touches his fingers to Xue Yang's chest for a moment, feeling the beat of his heart against his fingertips. Yes, here is where the credit belongs, not in a dull man like Xiao Xingchen.
He sighs happily, still holding him by the wrist to guide him back. They can work on the rest of dinner together, he'll try to make it enjoyable. Xingchen hums as he works, stopping when a smile crosses his lips.
"It was very brave of you, and very sweet to give me your first kiss. It's truly a treasure."
He's blushing so cutely too.
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His free hand comes up and he teases at the cloth covering Xingchen's heart, not hard enough to really even disturb the cloth. Just enough to be felt. Because he desperately wants to touch, to hold, to keep this man. This peace. But it's not his right, these are all stolen moments. But he's greedy for them.
He lets himself be turned and guided to where Xingchen wants him, and sets to work beside him. Arms occasionally bumping together, not that he minds at all (maybe even done on purpose, who can say?) The comment has him blink over at the other man, seeing the adorable blush that distracts him enough another admission slips out.
"...The first kiss I've wanted to give. I couldn't resist. I can't resist you, Daozhang." The last bit is an attempt at his usual tease, but he means every word.
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The words that follow make him laugh again though, even when Xue Yang is so very serious about them. He finishes with their meal preparations, putting everything on to cook first before turning towards the other man.
There's suddenly a sweet in the palm of his hand, a shiny wrapped candy. Their tradition has not been forgotten. Xingchen smiles and offers a playful challenge.
"You can choose it or me, but not both. Which is it?"
Blind in every way. But Xingchen thinks, how can it be a contest? Of course he'll choose the candy.
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Xue Yang of course starts to reach for the candy when it appears, but then goes still at the options presented to him. He could be angry with such a choice, but instead he shakes his head with an amused little laugh.
"...I choose you. Your kisses are sweeter than any candy."
Of course it's not a contest. He steps forward, hand dropping away from the sweet, and leans in to kiss that smiling mouth again.
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